Different Strokes

I wrote on my twitter account (follow me!) the other day that I found it so interesting how people of the same age can be so different and on such different wave lengths. It’s like we all hit the age of, let’s say 20, and boom – we start spiraling in different directions. Lucky for me, my strong relationships with my friends are withstanding our differences, but it still takes work when you’re moving in one direction and your friends are moving in the opposite. This revelation came about when I was facebook stalking (yes, I do that from time to time) a girl who was in many of my English classes. She was super cool, and I saw she had posted pictures from a wedding she attended. The wedding was for two people who were my age: Two 21 year-olds tying the knot. In the next picture someone snapped of this charming girl, she was holding up her own engagement ring-wrapped finger. The guy (who is also 21) she had been dating for 2 years asked her to marry him.

Now here’s where my different people, same age, story comes in. I have not yet attended a friend’s wedding. I have no close friends who have babies (a number of people I graduated with have children now, but no one close to me.) I do have many friends who are in long term relationships, but they keep saying 25, 26…30 will be when they say “I do.” (Many of my friends have also left long term relationships realizing they wanted different things as they grew older.) Now I grant you, maybe if I was in such a relationship, I would be singing a different tune, but the idea of marriage right now literally makes me laugh out loud. I’m 21, soon to be 22. What do I know about life, myself, or the world to be able to make such an important commitment? I need to see Paris first; I need to move to New York City and live in my tiny apartment; I need to be promoted to a full-time job. Perhaps I’m selfish, but I have so many more “me” things to accomplish before I sign up for a “we.” But this is me, and I am not every other woman in the world. People are different. Regions are different. Women of the South marry much younger on average than women of the Northeast (I watched a show once that said if a southern belle was single at 23, her family started to grow concerned.). The national average for women to marry is age 25, so maybe I’m not totally off base with my thinking, but marrying while still in college seems ludicrous to me. I know many people marry after college but even that (23?) seems so young. My parents got married at 28 (and are happily married today) so that could have something to do with my thought process.

I don’t have an end comment to this post, because I will not sit here and judge others for their life choices – There is no right or wrong answer. I have a feeling a few of my friends will be marrying in the next couple of years, but I’m almost certain no one will be attending a Jersey Girl soon to be City Girl wedding for quite sometime. But what do I know? I could pull a Khloe; meet a guy tomorrow and marry him two months later.