Taking Risks

First thing’s first. I need to wish my best friend in the entire world (who doesn’t read my blog regularly!) a very happy birthday. She is the big 2-1 today. It is unreal to me that she is both older than me (she looks like she’s still 15!) and officially legal. I have had my best moments with her right by my side, and whether it is attending concerts together (Miley and Britney were awesome!) or traveling together (Myrtle Beach again soon?), we never get tired of seeing one another. Well, I don’t get tired of seeing her face – she’ll have to tell you if she gets bored of me ☺. She knows all of my deepest darkest secrets, and is officially a member of my immediate family. So, to my soul sister and partner-in-crime Meghan, I hope you have the best 21st birthday anyone has ever had. I’m very upset that I’m stuck in Columbus reading Charles Dickens while you are drinking Margaritas at the moment, but I will see you at the end of April and we will finally be buying each other birthday drinks! Oh, and hopefully this post will inspire you to read my blog more often. Xoxo

Now, back to actual blogging. I have a “bucket list” for my life (who doesn’t?), and today I crossed a few small items off of it. For those who don't know, the “bucket list” is the term used for a list of things to do before you die. My list is quite long. Some items on the list are places I want to visit – China, Ireland, and Paris being a few. Others are social challenges such as asking a guy out to dinner. Today, I was able to cross off another social task that I have wanted to do for a long time: I ate alone in public. This may sound funny, but I do not do well in public spaces by myself. I need to always be doing something. I’m that girl at a party who, when her friends get separated from her, takes out her cell phone and pretends to be texting someone, when in reality she is just hitting buttons and looking through her calendar. Pathetic, I know, but I just can’t help it. I decided when I came to college that life is all about taking risks. We need to get out of our comfort zones in order to grow. Last year, I did something I thought I would never be able to do: I gave a guy I was crushing on my phone number (Gasp!). He didn’t ask for it, but I didn’t want our communication to end, so I went for it. I wrote it down on a piece of paper and gave it to him before he left class. To me, how that relationship turned out isn’t what mattered (we stayed acquaintances, but nothing really came of it). It was more the fact that I was able to leap out of my comfort zone and do something that left me shaking as I left the class – I was so proud of my shy, self-conscious self.

Focusing back on today, I have a large gap in between my two English classes, so instead of going home, I decided to get food. Normally, I would grab the food to go and eat in an empty hallway in the English building with my cell phone attached to my ear and my computer on my lap. Instead, I went to Brennans on High Street – a place I have never been to before (another item on my list – eat at new places in Columbus!), and ordered a bagel, soup and a banana. I then sat at a table by myself and ate lunch. I glanced around at people, spent time with my inner thoughts, and did not take out any items to distract me from my solitude. My honey wheat bagel and myself sat there exposed to the world. It felt wonderful, and much easier than I thought it would be! I’ll probably do it quite often this quarter during my break, trying out new eateries of course.

My next goal is to go see a movie by myself. My friend Lauryn did this back in high school a few times, and I remember how jealous I was that she had the confidence to do that. Her reasoning: “A movie came out that I wanted to see, and no one else wanted to go, so I went by myself.” I’m the loser who waits for the DVD release. Eating for ten minutes by yourself is one thing. Seeing a two hour movie is an entirely different ballpark, but I will accomplish it. I will be brave! It may take me some time, but I will take the risks, because being a risk-taker makes you happy, confident, and let’s face it, pretty awesome.